


It Could Have Been Me

by supernaturallylost



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Closeted Dean, Established Relationship, Fluff, Kinda, Love Confessions, Marriage Proposal, Multi, Romance, Romantic Fluff, SO MUCH FLUFF, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Weddings, after season 11 with the assumption everything is fine, basically it's all the same as if jess hadn't died and sam met her recently, just fluff, seriously, seriously gross and out of character fluff, to be read while listening to come what may on repeat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 19:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7004200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernaturallylost/pseuds/supernaturallylost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two months ago, Dean's secret boyfriend proposed. Dean, who is still in the closet, refused and asked for space. At Sam's wedding, however, he realizes what he really wants.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Could Have Been Me

The music starts quietly, but suddenly. The violins introduce the melody as the piano taps along gently. On one side of the aisle, well dressed men and women are standing from their seats on the pews, turning conspicuously to see behind them. On the other side, a few casually dressed men stand and shake their heads. Among the latter is one man in a long tan trench coat and a navy blue tie. He is the only person not looking over his shoulder as someone walks the aisle.

The church is lit with the light of the midday sun. Near the altar, Dean Winchester stands beside his brother, who is more nervous than he has ever been before. Sam Winchester, after inhaling deeply, turns around to watch the aisle. There, he sees the woman he’s been waiting for.

She walks forward in short heels. They look like shoes from the 1950s, and they accentuate her dainty feet and attractive ankles. Her dress, white as a Sunday cloud, is only slightly shorter in the front to expose her shoes. The dress wraps around her body loosely, giving the barest support to her breasts, which are moving with her rapid breaths and slow steps. Behind her, a five foot train of white lace follows from the ground, and a two foot veil follows from the air. She is a vision of serenity. She is almost at the altar now, and Sam bites his lip to keep it from quivering.

“Jess,” he whispers when she is close enough to him. “You’re so beautiful.”

The music fades, the ceremony begins, and tears fall. Remaining tearless and bemused, however, is the guest in the tan trench coat. His eyes are the only pair not fixed on the bride and groom. His eyes, in fact, are focused on the best man. Dean Winchester is crying, and to any other observer, they would seem happy tears – proud tears. To this guest, however, the tears seem undeniably sad.

 

The ceremony ends after half an hour, and the reception follows immediately. Every guest arrives at the hall before the bridal party, as is the custom, and so Castiel is standing among strangers for several minutes. He is able to smile, to observe human bliss, and keep eyes on the party. Then, however, he sees Dean again.

The bridal party arrives in parts, and the bride and groom are the last in the door. Sam and Jess are grinning infectiously, and Dean is smiling just as widely. Again, Castiel is the only person to perceive the smile as it truly is. Dean’s smile is welcoming, kind, and joyful, of course, but it is also sad.

 

The guests are almost all gone from the venue now. Sam and Jess left earlier in a car Dean had built from the ground up especially for them. Now, the bridal party remains to clean the area. Only one guest hasn’t left yet, and Dean finally looks at him.

 

Dean cleared his throat and announced to the bridal party that he could finish cleaning the rest by himself and they should go home and get some rest. They agreed, seeing the determination in Dean’s eyes, and soon, Dean was left alone in the room with Castiel.

Without a word, Dean walked over and turned the speakers from the DJ booth back on. He connected his small iPod party favor, which Jess had filled with her own special wedding playlist. He smiled affectionately when the first song started playing in the empty room.

With a deep breath, Dean turned around. Castiel stood in the middle of the room, waiting. Dean walked forward with his palm outstretched. Castiel shrugged off his trench coat and his suit jacket, dropping them on a random chair, and then stepped forward to accept the invitation.

While David Bowie filled the room with music, Dean pulled Cas close to him and put one hand on his hip. From side to side, they swayed, dancing gently until the song picked up even more. Then, Dean let Castiel lead him in a real dance. He smiled and even twirled, moving around some of the napkins that had fallen on the floor during the dinner.

Outside, the sun had set. Inside, only one set of twinkling lights was left turned on by the dance floor. As Dean and Cas pulled each other closer and closer and played an elaborate game of cat and mouse while dancing, Dean smiled his happiest smile of the night.

They were both panting a little when the song changed.

“I never knew I could feel like this – like I’ve never seen the sky before,” came the lyrics of the next song. The greatest love song, from Moulin Rouge, started to play.

For this song, Dean leaned forward, letting his head fall onto Cas’s shoulder, his arms draped easily around Cas’s shoulders while Cas held firmly onto Dean’s waist. They swayed slowly, closing their eyes as the song played. They could feel each other’s heartbeats increase as the song neared its end.

“Seasons may change – winter to spring – but I love you until the end of time.”

Dean’s eyes opened. Above Cas’s shoulder, he saw the room.

Tables with white cloths, the dishes long since cleared away, were pushed closer together and farther from the dance floor. The guests had been lively at this wedding, Dean noted. He smiled to himself, breathing in Cas’s scent as they moved in a slow circle.

“Come what may,” the song continued.

Dean’s hands gripped Cas’s shoulders and he knew…

Quietly, in Cas’s ear, Dean whispered the last lyrics of the song.

“Come what may, I will love you until my dying day.”

Dean swallowed hard and leaned back. The fingers that had been gripping Castiel’s dress shirt slid fluidly around the back of his neck, bringing his face forward. Dean leaned in and gently, like a wave on the beach, kissed Cas. Dean gripped Cas’s hair in one hand and moved his other hand down his chest, finally wrapping it around and resting it on the small of Cas’s back. Dean pulled Castiel as close as he could, tracing his lips with his tongue. Eventually, he pressed their foreheads together and let them breathe.

Dean breathed hotly over Cas’s mouth before he said, “It could have been me…”

“It’s not too late,” Cas said, trying to pull away. “You can find a wife and get married and…”

“No!” Dean argued, staring at Cas with hurt eyes. “I don’t want anyone else, Cas!”

“Dean,” Cas whispered, his heart beating unevenly.

“I love you,” Dean said, staring Cas directly in his eyes. “I’m ready now, Cas. I am.”

Cas’s shoulders fell, but a smile formed on his face. He took a deep breath.

“The ring’s in my coat,” he admitted with a sigh.

Dean grinned with furrowed brows.

“You kept it all this time?”

“Dean, I asked you to marry me two months ago; it wasn’t that long.”

Dean shook his head, laughed, and pulled Cas in for another kiss. Then, quickly, he ran to Cas’s coat and brought it over. Castiel sighed, felt around his pockets, and pulled out a small box.

“You sure you’re ready?” Cas asked once more. “It’s okay if you’re not, Dean.”

Dean smiled, saying nothing.

“You’ll have to tell Sam, and who knows how anyone else will react,” Cas explained, giving Dean an excuse if he needed one.

Dean shook his head.

“I don’t care what they do, Cas,” he said. He put his hand on Cas’s wrist and nodded. “It’s time. This could have been me – it could have been us. It’s time for us, Cas.”

Cas’s eyes watered a little bit, but he blinked it away. Then, he took a breath, kneeled down on the ground, and opened the ring box. Inside was a white gold ring with a matte finish. He grinned at it, though he’d seen it twice before now.

“Dean Winchester,” Cas started arbitrarily. Then his eyes laughed and he smiled. “I love you, and I will love you for the rest of my days.”

“You could just say forever,” Dean rolled his eyes.

“Sh,” Cas said. “It’s my proposal.”

Dean grinned and looked down at the beautiful, gorgeous, handsome (how many more synonyms could Dean think of?) man on his knees in front of him.

“Dean,” Cas started again, this time grinning broadly. “With your permission, I’d like to spend an eternity making you happy.”

Dean would always deny it afterward, but his eyes watered at that point.

“Will you marry me?” Cas asked, his voice quiet while the music from the wedding playlist continued to run.

Dean bit his bottom lip to try to keep his smile in check. Then, he took a step back. He kneeled before Cas so they were at eye level. Keeping eye contact, Dean pulled a ring box from his coat as well.

The flash of surprise on Cas’s face was worth the wait, Dean decided.

“One condition,” Dean whispered, presenting a golden ring to Cas. “I will only marry you on one condition.”

Cas gave a breathy laugh and nodded.

“Anything, Dean.”

A tear fell down Dean’s face and he said, as quietly as he could,

“Never let me go a day without telling you how much I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> What...!! A double proposal?!?!?! This is crazy!!! :P I just had this image of Dean and Cas dancing alone in the dirty and dark reception area from Sam's wedding. Like, yes. :D
> 
> Thanks for reading! Here's the song that started it (on Youtube): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV7KqBLCekk&list=RDegYUpyU-GxU&index=4
> 
> The title is from this song (on Youtube): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARhk9K_mviE


End file.
